Many of us know there are some people out there that take their bad day out on others. Misery loves company. We are human and it’ll happen to the best of us.
When this happens to you, it’s easy to retaliate with that person or take it personally. For some people, if someone yells at them over something they didn’t do, they will hold on to that anger for hours. Sometimes for the entire day or even the entire week! I’ve even seen people so bent out of shape about it that they’ve told the story to several different people. Holding onto such anger and hostility is so unhealthy for you. Not only that, you’re allowing a complete stranger to ruin your day. Is it worth it? Not for me.
I worked in the hotel industry for over eight years. Let me tell you, I have had every angry person yell at me for something unrelated to me. Some of them will air all their dirty laundry about why their day was horrible and you are just their punching bag. Others will be angry with you for some unknown reason but they need someone to unload their misery to. I’ve had customers yell at me in front of groups of people in the hotel lobby. They could care less that they are embarrassing you, let alone themselves.
It’s not easy when someone treats you that way when you have to maintain professionalism. During the entire “production”. There have been times, depending on the situation, that the anger will linger longer than I would like it to. That’s because my day turned into a domino effect. Where I will have one customer like that after another and so forth. Which sometimes leads me to my breaking point.
The point where you no longer have a filter and can no longer bite your tongue. That’s the zone I try my hardest to avoid. No matter what, I don’t allow it to drag on the entire day or the next day. I always say to myself: “Tomorrow is a new day”.
The reason I created this post is because I had a moment that I could see it from another perspective. We don’t always know what someone is actually going through in their life when they act a certain way. Unfortunately, not everyone has a good grip of control over his or her feelings and reactions.
Controlling your feelings is difficult in the hospitality industry. Dealing with assholes all day in your face, blaming you, cursing at you, causing scenes. And you take it. You apologize. You kiss their ass. You do everything you don’t want to do in that moment, but know you have to do because it’s professional and civil. People like that sometimes don’t have a filter and don’t care whom they take their anger out on. It takes constant practice not taking your anger out on others or letting it affect you when others do that to you.
Last week I got into a terrifying car accident and today I am lucky to be alive. The following days after my accident, I was pretty frightened to drive. People were on my ass when I was going the speed limit or they were cutting me off for no reason. Here I was terrified of driving and they could see my car was not in the best of conditions. Yet several people continued driving that way around me.
I sat there and thought they have no idea what I went through. How I almost lost my life the day before. Experiencing that helped me change my attitude of how I looked at other drivers. I have no idea what type of day they are having or what they may be going through in their life. It was then that I started looking more outward to see the people around me.
Today, a customer at work responded to me with a short and not so friendly attitude. She even had a disgruntled face and looked irritated. I was a bit taken back from the way she was acting towards me, yet I smiled and spoke to her in a welcoming manner. After a few minutes of speaking with her she got emotional. She apologized for being that way and told me her Mom passed away yesterday.
Today was her first day of work and she didn’t want anyone to know. Since she knew I wasn’t her manager, she let her guard down and told me that. She was trying so hard to keep it together, that just talking was hard for her. For goodness sake, she lost her Mom last night and is here today starting a new job. I was completely heartbroken for her. I felt her sadness. I can’t even imagine going through that and trying to be in her shoes right now.
Take a moment during those trying times and give that person the benefit of the doubt. They may be going through a difficult time in their life. Send out the positive vibes!